My Heart, Mein Bruder
by fyrefox13
Summary: Germany harbors forbidden feelings for his brother, unfortunately for him, Prussia is already involved with Austria. Can he ever win? M for language, alcohol smut, war, and mature themes. GerxPru yaoi & PruxAus fluff
1. Chapter 1

**Author's note:** This was done in a Role Play with me as Prussia and Austria, and my good friend Linnéa as Germany.

**Disclaimer:** Hetalia and it's characters are © Hidekazu Himaruya. I just wrote a story about the characters.

**Rating:** This story is rated M for a reason. This multi-chapter story does contain Yaoi (gay sexy times) language, alcohol use, war, and mention of the Nazi party.

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><p>"Oi! VEST!" was all Ludwig could hear across the room, even amongst the shouting, obscenely loud and drunk Germans in the bar. It was the weekend, and of course, it was packed with enebriated idiots basically. Ludwig kinda went there to get away from his annoying brother Gilbert, but like always, his brother found him one way or another...<p>

Ludwig set aside the woman in his lap and put down his beer mug, wiping his mouth. "Ja?"

"Vest! Guess vhat!" Gilbert shouted as he crossed the bar, making his way to his brother. "Guess vhat!"

He sighed, rolling his eyes. "Vwhat?"

"Francis gave me some photos!" Gilbert declared as he handed an envelope to his brother, grinning wildly. He couldn't wait to see the look on Ludwig's face when he saw them.

"Mein Gott, what now..." He said, pulling some of the pictures out. His eye twitched slightly and his mouth open, like he was trying to find words, but stumbled. "..H-how did you get these..?"

"I told you! France gave tzem to me!" The Prussian grinned as Ludwig flipped through the photos, amused by his brother's face to no end.

Ludwig put the photos back in the envelope, clearly displeased. He shot daggers at his brother, as if ripping out his throat was required to enact vengeance..."Gilbert, get these away from me. BURN THEM."

"Vhy? I tzought you'd be amused to see silly photos of Mr. Priss."

"Ja, but..ze're of ME TOO!"

"Oh? Are tzey?" Gilbert made a curious face and flipped through them again. "Oh, Ja... I guess they are... KESESE! Vest, you look ridiculous in tzose patched boxers!"

"Gott, please kill me..." Ludwig whispered to himself. "Look, I'm going home. Thanks for ruining another night for me..." Ludwig grabbed his jacket and laid the bill on the bar counter.

"Oi! Don't be like tzat Vest! Come back!" Gilbert followed him towards the door. "Come on! Bruder, it's just a joke!"

"If you have any care for me in ze vworld, you'll destory zose."

"Aww, come on Bruder, Tzey're funny!"

Ludwig blushed and stormed his way outside in the cold.

Gilbert struggled with his coat a moment before following Ludwig. "Come on Ludwig!"

"Bruder, just let me go home! I've had enough humiliation for one evening!"

Gilbert stopped in his tracks, and watched his brother walk away. "Well fine tzen! Just go!"

"Fine! I vwill!" He proceded to storm off back home through 4 inches of snow, no car of course. He couldn't drive with as drunk as he was. There was no way he could make it alone though.

Gilbert had gone back into the bar for a few minutes, before his conscious got the better of him and he went back out to find Ludwig. "Bruder? Bruder? Oi! Vest! Come back!"

Ludwig was huddled in all his winter wear, but he was still shivering and shuddering under all the clothes. The alcohol had only kept him warm for a little while. The physical effort of trudging through the frost had him worn down quickly.

Gilbert was jogging along the route back to the house, looking for his brother. He really did feel bad about what happened, and he was going to find him and apologize.

Ludwig took a break and sat down next to a streetlamp. It was aronud 1 in the morning, according to clock in the town square. He had lost most of his energy by now.

A few minutes later, Gilbert reached the square, looking around and nearly missing the shape beneath the lamp. "Bruder? Are you here Vest?"

"Ja," his voice echoed from way down the street.

"Bruder!" Gilbert shouted as he headed towards the voice in a jog, straining to find his brother in the snow. "Vest!"

"Here!" his hoarse voice emitted mist in the cold air.

"Ludwig!" Gilbert shouted and ran as he spotted him. "Don't go off in the snow like that again!" He scolded his not-so-little, younger brother as he got close.

Ludwig really wanted to punch his brother, but he knew he himself was stupid enough to go out in the cold like that, drunk of all situations. "Can you help me home, please?"

With a heavy sigh, Gilbert put his hand out to his brother. "Ja, Of course I'll help you home Bruder."

"Danke, bruder..." He stumbled to get up because of the sleet under his worn-down boot tread.

Gilbert hoisted him up, trying to make sure they didn't both go down. "Bitte. Let's get you home." Gilbert said, pulling the other's arm around his shoulders, and wrapped his own arm around his waist for support before starting the walk back home.

They finally got home, Ludwig a drunk cold mess. This wasn't the first time this had happened. "Help me up to bed, huh?"

Gilbert frowned and sighed. "You need to get warm before you go to bed, Bruder."

"I'm so tired..."

"Oi! Nein! Take a warm bath!" Gilbert insisted as he dregged his heavier younger brother up the stairs.

"Ahhh..." he groaned in displeasure like a child refusing to do something he didn't like. "Lemme get my clothes off.." Ludwig swerved and almost fell over trying to take off his shoes and jacket, nearly knocking the lamp off the table.

Grabbing his brother to steady him, he took him by the shoulders and sat him down. "You're like you vere vhen you vere a child when you're drunk. Sit down und let me help you!"

Ludwig sat down down lazily in the lounge chair, tossing his head back.

Sighing, Gilbert reluctantly helped his inebriated brother out of his clothing.

"Can we hurry this up, bitte?" Ludwig's words were slurred heavily now.

"I'm trying Bruder, but mein hands are still cold."

"Hey, hey.." He was starting to laugh for no reason. "Y-you should-you should totally get in the tub with me like you-you -hiccup- used to"

Gilbert flushed and looked up at his brother from working on the boots. "You're not a child anymore Bruder."

"Nein, really. Y-you said you vwere c-c-cold...You should...try it with me." Ludwig pointed his finger waving it as if he were making a point.

"I'll pass. I'll bathe after you're in bed." Gilbert said, yanking the other's boots off.

"Y-you sure?"

"Ja, I'm sure." Gilbert raised his eyebrow at his brother, trying to ignore his drunkenness before a crash came from the kitchen. "Shieße... Wait here Vest, I'll go see vhat's going on down tzere." With that Gilbert ran downstairs to check.

"Huh..ok.." He sat in a drunk daze, mouth agape.

A few minutes later, the Prussian comes back up the stairs, shaking his head and carrying two cups of hot coco. Handing one to Ludwig, he sipped his own. "It vas just Priss being clumsy and refusing to turn on a light."

"D-danke..." he tried to reach his hand out to grab the cup.

Sitting his own cup down, Gilbert helped his brother with his chocolate. "I'm going to have to help you into the bath, aren't I?"

"Prolly.." Ludwig snickered and giggled stupidly.

With a feigned groan, Gilbert helped his brother up and dragged him to the bathroom before helping him with the rest of his clothes after starting the water running.

"H-hey, I'm n-naked, aren't I?" He laughed again with his tongue hanging out his mouth.

Shaking his head in bemusement, Gilbert just chuckled. "Ja, you are."

"Make me warm..bath time.." by now, Ludwig sounded more of a dumbass than Gilbert did at this level of drunken behavior

"Just get up and get in Ludwig." Gilbert said flatly, staring at his brother, wondering if he ever got that stupidly drunk.

Ludwig finally got in the tub, thank Gott. It took him a while, but he got in.

Gilbert took a seat next to the tub, deciding his brother was so drunk, he'd best not leave least the other drown.

"You don't have to s-stay. I won't drown.." he mumbled, making boat noises while playing in the water.

"Nein. After you walking off into the snow, I'm not going anyvhere." Gilbert said, letting his head fall back against the wall.

"You worry too much."

"You're a stupid drunk."

"And y-youre -hiccup- a stupid stupid face..."

"Vhat? My face is AWESOME!"

"Ja, y-yuh heard me! I didn't sss-studderrr!"

"You're stuttering now."

"Get me another beer, beer frau! HA!"

"Nein! No more Bier tonight! Tzat's vhat got you lost in tze snow!" Gilbert raised his voice, but couldn't keep yelling. He'd honestly gotten scared looking for Ludwig earlier, especially when he found him sitting alone in the freezing cold.

Ludwig reeled back and crossed his arms, pouting. He stuck out his tongue. "You're no fun."

"You almost froze. Just warm up and get to bed Bruder." He scolded. "Don't scare me like that again."

"I scared you?"

"Ja! You stumbled off into the snow. Und I found you sitting in the freezing cold! How tze hell am I supposed to feel vhen mein bruder does sometzing so stupid, eh?"

"I-I'm sorry.." He was drunk, but he could still feel remorse for his actions.

"You'd better be!" Gilbert glared at him. He'd raised Ludwig to be smarter than this.

"I want out now," Ludwig ordered.

"Nein! You're still shaking!" Gilbert folded his arms and continued to glare at him.

Ludwig splashed water at Gilbert and laughed like a devious little boy. "You're wet!"

Gilbert didn't even try to shield himself from it and ended up staring out from behind wet bangs. "Und you're drunk, cold, and wet."

"Uh-huh. Your point?" Ludwig splashed him again. "I want out. I'm hungry.."

Gilbert let it happen again. "Stop shivvering, und you can get out."

"I'm n-not...I shouldn't have t-to do anything you tell m-m-me.."

"Tzen get your drunk ass out of tzere yourself."

"Fine. I vwill.." Ludwig grabbed the sides of the tub and tried to push himself up, but it was futile. He just fell back down and splashed more water out onto the tile floor.

With a sigh, Gilbert got up and shook his head. "You're hopeless." With that he handed Ludwig his hot coco again. "Here, drink. It'll help you warm up." With that, he grabbed his own in an attempt to warm himself.

Ludwig sipped from it, still flustered, but he'd probably be too drunk to remember it in the morning. "Can you help out of the bath...please? I'm exhausted."

Gilbert shot him a look. "Nein. Just sit and relax for a minute."

"But I'm tired. Bruder."

"I know. But you're still shivering." Gilbert put a hand on Ludwig's arm, and shook his head. "At least slide down a bit and warm up your body."

He gurgled under the water as he slid down, chin-deep, still ticked he wasn't getting what he wanted. Ludwig was starting to progressively warm up. His shaking ceased and his skin turned from a cold pallid shade to his normal complexion.

Gilbert kept an eye on the drunk german in the tub, making sure he didn't drown, and nodded as his complexion came back. "Feeling better?"

"Jawohl. Much better." He was starting to sober up, too. "I want to get out. My skin's pickled and I'm tired."

With a sigh, Gilbert nodded. "Okay, Let's get you out." He grabbed a towel, and pulled the drain stopper.

"Danke, finally.." He wrapped the towel around his waist as he stood up and got out of the tub. "What time is it?" he asked.

"Late." Gilbert said flatly. He was getting tired himself, and had missed out on the drinking almost entirely.

"I have a guest coming over in the morning. Scheiße!" Ludwig looked at the grandfather clock at the end of the hallway. "It's 6 am! Fick She'll be here in 2 hours!" He fled to his room and almost tripped on the floor runner getting there.

Sighing and going after him, Gilbert grabbed his brother's arm. "Ludwig, go lay down. I'll pick up."

"I can't. She'll be here and-" he couldn't heard that much in the distance of his room while he was panicking trying to find something nice to wear. "No time for sleep!"

"Vest! Oi! Stop a second! Vhat do you need done?"

"Get the maids to have the tables set und the dishes put out - um, oh! get them to start cleaning up around the house as clean as clean can get! I vwon't have anyzing dirty. Und tell them to cook something Italian up. She doesn't care vhwat. Just somesing!" He was hurridely putting on his vest and combing back his hair.

"Okay, can do." Gilbert said, waiting for the moment Ludwig went into his bedroom, slamming the door on him, locked it, and propped it closed with a chair "I'm sorry Vest! Take a nap!" Gilbert shouted as he went to work on what needed to be done.

"You arschloch! Open zis verdammt door VRIGHT NOW! I AM NOT A CHILD! GAHHH!" He banged and banged on the door until his fingers hurt and the sides of his hands were red. Eventually, he gave up and plopped down on the bed.

Gilbert ignored the shouting and instructed the maids to do the same as they worked, and set about making sure Austria was pre-occupied with something so he'd be out of the way and not trying to get between Vest and Feliciana.


	2. Chapter 2

**Author's note:** This was done in a Role Play with me as Prussia and Austria, and my good friend Linnéa as Germany.

**Disclaimer:** Hetalia and it's characters are © Hidekazu Himaruya. I just wrote a story about the characters.

**Rating:** This story is rated M for a reason. This multi-chapter story does contain Yaoi (gay sexy times) language, alcohol use, war, and mention of the Nazi party.

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><p>A good half hour had passed, and Ludwig was sacked out asleep. It was about 10 after 8 when the doorbell rang, waking him up. "Gilbert! Gilbert let me out!" He started banging on the door again.<p>

Gilbert pushed Austria out the back door on his way to the store a moment before he heard the doorbell, and went to answer, dusting off his clothes and smoothing his hair as he went. He greeted her warmly, with a kiss on each cheek, and led her into the living room before excusing himself a minute. Quickly making his way upstairs, he braced himself to be screamed at and opened the door.

"BRUDER!" Ludwig grabbed Gilbert's shirt collar lightly before letting go to slick back his hair and straighten his clothes. He stuck out his tongue and made his way downstairs to greet the lovely young lady. "Mein Fräulein," He kissed her on the hand and then on the cheek. "How are you?" They were both seated at the table, an empty place made for Gilbert to join them.

Gilbert didn't even fight back. He wasn't going to ruin all his work over this. When Ludwig went downstairs, he hung back a few minutes to give them some time to themselves as he looked over his own appearance, which was in shambles after everything, and eventually joined them.

"Ah, you've meant mein bruder, Gilbert." He said, gesturing towards him. "Join us, please."

"Of course we've met!" Gilbert smiled and tousled her hair a bit before sitting down.

Ludwig more than certainly didn't approve of Gilbert's manners. Feliciana sat all lovely and proper, looking beautiful and conversing about her usual likings of the time being. Ludwig sat and listened to her in a daze, paying almost no attention to some of her words; he was too distracted with having a gorgeous young lady over for once that wasn't a dimestore harlott his brother had dragged in.

Gilbert had to admit, the Italian girl was cute, but his brother was so happy with her, he knew better than to presume. He ended up listening to her every word, watching her, and finding her completely adorable. So very adorable, much like her brother.

A few hours had passed; another lovely morning date. Ludwig bid her farewell as he helped her out to her car. After he shut the door to the front room, he slid down it and put his face in his hands.

Gilbert had disappeared from the table some time before, trying to give the two some space, and ended up sitting in the living room, curled on the couch, reading one of Japan's manga.

Ludwig groaned and fell on his side on the floor, clearly frustrated. "I can't do this anymore..."

Gilbert looked up over the top of the book and quirked an eyebrow. "What's tze matter Bruder?"

"I-I just can't do it anymore, Gilbert..I can't.." He couldn't find the right words to really explain himself.

"Do vhat?" He said, sitting down the copy of Astro Boy he was working on. "Vhat's got you down?"

"...I'm not...really interested in her...look...I'm.." Ludwig couldn't tell his brother. He'd hate him for this.

"Hrm? Vhat? Mein bruder isn't interested in such a pretty girl? Vhat tze hell is wrong vitz you?" Gilbert exclaimed, getting up and putting a hand to his brother's forehead. "Are you feeling okay?"

"I'm not interested...in girls..." Ludwig bit his lip and cradled his head behind his arms up against his knees.

Gilbert stood dumbfounded a moment before smirking. "Ah HA! So TZAT is tze problem!" With a grin, Gilbert threw his arm around his brother's shoulder and whispered to him. "You should talk to Hungary, she'll gladly set you up... Just don't let her know it was me vho sent you."

His eyes got wide and he just wanted to sucker punch Gilbert so hard right now. "You can't tell ANYONE! GOT IT? UGHHH!" He did his usual storming off routine when he didn't prefer confrontation.

Gil just stood there blinking. "Jeez... I said YOU should talk to her Bruder... BRUDER!" He shouted before running after him.

Ludwig slammed the door behind him in his room, yet he forgot to lock it out rage.

Gilbert followed him in, yanking the door open and slamming it behind him. "Vhat tze hell is your problem?"

He walked up to Gilbert, tongue in cheek. Ludwig didn't say anything. He got face to face with his brother, and then he slammed him against the wall, kissing him.

Panic filled Gilbert as he got slammed into the wall, and overflowed as Ludwig kissed him. Was this how Austria felt when he pinned him down? He started regretting his own behavior, and tried to push his brother off of him.

Ludwig had a good hold on Gilbert. He pulled away gasping for air. "Just leave..." He turned around and walked over to his bed, falling over on it.

Gilbert stood there wide-eyed for a moment, before sliding down the wall. "Vhat tze hell vas tzat?"

He didn't answer. All he could do was bury his head in his pillow. "obviously nothing..." he said to himself.

"Are you... Attracted to me?"

Ludwig was still in the same fetal position, clenching onto the pillow. He wanted to yell or scold someone, but he couldn't but himself. It was hard to admit that he had his own good reasons behind that kiss.

"Bruder. Answer me. Are you attracted to me?"

"JA! Will you leave me alone now?"

Gilbert tried not to freak out, not moving from his spot on the floor. "Vhat did you vant vhen you kissed me?"

"I don't know..." something overwhelmed his train of thought that really, there was no certain explanation that could make sense to his brother.

With a gulp, he wondered just where this was going to go. "You wanted more tzan tzat, didn't you?"

"Do I have to say anything more..?"

"Ja. I vant to know Bruder."

"what do you think I wanted?"

"Vhat if... I let you." Gilbert squeaked out with a gulp.

Ludwig peered up from the pillow. "What are you saying..?"

Gilbert just looked away and tried to steel himself from running away. "What if I let you?" He wouldn't say it, but he kinda wanted to know what it was like for Roderich when he forced the other down. He'd had a taste of it, and he was honestly hard, but he was scared. It sort of made him feel bad about invading Roderich's vital regions. Was he doing this for his own punishment?

Ludwig sat up, taking his shirt off. "You want me to?"

Gilbert felt a knot form in his gut, and he squeaked out a small "Yes."

"Come here," Ludwig gestured.

Slowly, Gilbert got up, and went towards the bed, his heart racing a mile a minute.

"Lie down," his voice stern and demanding.

Gilbert's eyes widened, and part of him wanted to run, but he found himself following his brother's direction, sitting down first, before laying down.

Ludwig stood up, closing his eyes thinking about what he was going to do. "Forgive me, brother.." He unzipped his pants and let them slide down around his ankles. He leaned over Gilbert, nose to nose.

Gilbert's breath caught in his throat, and he watched nervously, unsure why he was letting this happen.

"Turn over," he told him.

"Mmh... Why?" Gilbert asked, getting nervous, and desperately wanting to push him off. "Can I face you? Please?"

"I can't face you, so...please, just..turn over.."

Gilbert shook his head, starting to panic. "Nein... I'll walk away."

"You really want to see your own brother's face while I fuck your brains out?"

Gilbert shut his eyes tight, and shook his head. "Nein. I just don't want too. It's too much. I don't want to turn over." He couldn't admit it, but he was scared of such a vulnerable position where he had no control.

Ludwig grit his teeth. "Alright...take off your clothes.."

Gilbert kept his eyes closed, trying to take calm, even breaths, and started unfastening the buttons of his jacket, removing the belt. "You could help."

Ludwig put his hands around Gilbert's. "Let me," he unfastened the belt and buttons and pulled the pants off right around the rim of his boots, taking those off with them.

Gilbert lay there, trying to relax, trying to keep his mind off of who was removing his clothing, and what he was about to do.

"I'm sorry for this, bruder." Were his words before he leaned over and kissed his brother fervidly.

Gilbert felt his whole body react, and he gasped a bit. "Vest..."

"Ja?" his voice sultry in a deep and hoarse whisper.

"Please don't stop..." Gilbert whispered. He was so hard that his pants were getting painful, and he started writhing beneath his brother, trying to make contact.

Ludwig's mouth fell open before diving back in to tongue-lash his brother again. He pulled his mouth away, tongue dripping with saliva. His mouth moved down Gilbert's jawline and neck, biting and sucking on the skin. His hands moved around Gilbert's hips while prying his knees apart with the subtle movement of one leg.

Letting out a loud gasp, Gilbert bucked his hips against Ludwig's leg, spreading his eagerly. He wondered to himself when he'd become such a whore, but quickly chalked it up to spending too much time with France and Spain.

"You're more fiesty than I would expect you to be," Ludwig licked the side of his cheek.

"My best friends are Francis, and Antonio, remember." He gasped again, leaning into the small contact.

"I did, didn't I?" He bit him hard enough to draw blood, his member quite engorged and hard.

"Ah!" He moaned at the bite, arching his back.

Licking the blood, he trailed his sadistic kissing lower on the hipbones, eventually softening them as he bent down on the floor on his knees and put his mouth around the tip of Gilbert's member.

"Ooohhh... mmh... ja..." Gilbert writhed beneath his touch, and dug his fingers into the covers on the bed.

Ludwig flicked the end of it lovingly teasing his brother, of course. He moved his entire mouth around it, slowly sucking.

Trying to hold still, Gilbert's back arched, and he closed his eyes tightly.

He sucked harder, letting as much of his member as possible down his throat. He would frequently pull it out and put it back in to play with it.

Gilbert's body started shaking in pleasure, and he spread his legs further, encouraging him to continue.

Ludwig was persistent to see how far his brother could go. He went faster and harder, almost making his mouth tired.

Maybe it was the forbidden element of Ludwig being his brother, or the fact he was being submissive, Gilbert wasn't sure, but he couldn't help himself. He moaned loudly, and felt a familiar pressure pooling inside. France could give a DAMN good blow job, but this was amazing.

He was waiting to see how long it would take for Gilbert to come inside his mouth. He'd forgotten his brother took much longer, being heavily experienced.

Gilbert put a hand in Ludwig's hair, grabbing a handful and holding on as his brother moved. His whole body was writhing beneath him now, and his member grew even harder than before, and he knew he was close. "Unh... Vest..."

Ludwig looked up at Gilbert. Those blue eyes of his turned devilish with intent. He pulled away for a split second "Do it." Then he put his mouth back around.

His whole body tensed and a scream ripped out of his throat as he came hard in Ludwig's mouth, the feel his hot seed filling the other's mouth was almost too much.

Ludwig pulled out, cum dripping from his lips. He licked away at shortly before putting his mouth around Gilbert's and making him taste his own release.

Gilbert wrapped his arms around Ludwig's neck and pulled him close, loving lips with him and opening his mouth for the other eagerly.

"You taste amazing," he whispered in Gilbert's ear biting onto it

"Unh... I know. But I'd rather be filled by you." Gilbert breathed, wrapping his legs around the other.

"Of course," Ludwig grabbed a bottle from underneath the bed. "I use it for women, but it works..." he rubbed the liquid slowly around himself, slicking up. He groaned and closed his eyes to make sure he kept his brother's attention.

Gilbert opened his eyes tentatively to see where Ludwig was, and gasped at the size of his massive member. "Shieße Vest..."

He smiled, still working at himself. "I get it from you," his voice heavily appealing.

"Jawhol. Naturlich. Vest, don't forget to prepare me too." He breathed, getting nervous about that massive member going inside him.

"Vwhat do you mean...I thought you vere ze expert, remember?," he chuckled evilly.

"I mean you'd better prepare my body for tzat." A slight panic picking up in his voice.

"Of course, I kid, bruder. I only tease you cause it's fun," he bent over his brother and kissed him again, biting at the bottom lip as he let go. "I hope you can handle what I have to give you..."

"I can handle twice your size, just as long as you prepare me right, Bruder." The prussian sneered at his brother.

"Oh, is that it, huh? Are you saying I'm not up to par then?" Ludwig laughed at him.

"Nein. I'm just saying you had better do a DAMN good job down tzere before you take me." His sneer had deteriorated into an almost angry glare.

"You amuse me," me moved his lubricated fingers down Gilbert's chest across the plane of his abdomen and further down between his legs, inserting a finger. "Oh, you mean..like that?" He jested.

"Aahh! Un... Like tzat!" Gilbert groaned, his back arching at the insertion.

"Sehr gute...," he grinned, moving it in and out for a bit. "Another, mein bruder?"

"Ah... Ja! Anotzer... bitte" Gilbert was reduced to writing in pleasure already. If he'd had half his mind, he'd have scolded himself for being so damned easy.

Ludwig budged another in, still going in and out at the same pace.

Gilbert pulled his legs up towards his chest. He let out a moan, wondering why this felt so good. "Unh... Bruder..."

Ludwig was getting harder to hear that voice proclaim him, so he sped up.

"Ah! Bitte... Bruder..." Gilbert was panting now, his member so hard, he was getting to the point he could no longer stand just the fingers within him, he needed more. "Take me... now."

"Gladly," He pulled out and put his own member gently in place. He hovered over Gilbert, two hands on each side. He started moving in and out, but he didn't care much for taking any pleasure in seeing his brother's face, though. Ludwig preferred to take him from behind, no matter the teasing and the playing with everything else. No, it was quite different this time.

Gilbert closed his eyes tightly again. His fingers dug roughly into the sheets, turning white as he gripped them hard. The one thing he couldn't stop was his moaning, which he let escape his throat with reckless abandon.

Ludwig closed his own eyes; he didn't think he could handle see his brother like this much longer, or not at all. His taught and tense muscles had become glazed with sweat, his hair tousled from the exercise. "Bruder, please forgive me for this, please..."

"Ah.. ah... I do... uns... bru-der..." Gilbert pressed out between his moaning. He didn't care who it was pounding into him, he'd become lost in the pure pleasure of it. Suddenly there came a knock on the door.

"Gilbert? Is tzat you? Are you alright?" Roderich's voice came from the other side of the door. Gilbert's heart jumped into his throat, and he bit his tongue.

Ludwig started to panic. He tried to keep quiet from his animalistic grunting and heavy panting. "Scheiße.." he gathered his clothes and ran back into the bathroom, locking the door.

Gilbert was left staring in shock a moment before he realized that Ludwig as even gone. Sitting up, and trying to collect himself, he answered in a broken voice. "Yeah, I'm fine... It's nothing."

"Are you sure? You vere screaming... Und Vhy are you in Ludwig's room?" He called from the other side of the door. Gilbert was left dumbfounded, and unable to answer, his head still swimming in the pleasure.

Ludwig put his clothes back quickly. He wasn't coming out until Austria was completely gone.

Gilbert looked around the room in fear, wondering where Ludwig had gone. "I um... I was... um... Go avay before I tell people about C sharp!" He yelled back, desperately hoping that would work.

Ludwig snickered behind the door, hoping no one could hear him. It was funny to hear his sharp-wit brother pull a fast one on that prude.

"You're not in a better situation yourself Gilbert!" The austrian called out, before huffing and adding. "You owe me."

Gilbert let out a sigh, turning bright red, and answered. "Alright."

Ludwig cracked the door a bit to see if he had left yet.

Gilbert sat, red-faced on the bed, looking away from Ludwig in silence. Ashamed of what had just happened.

Ludwig felt more guilty than anyone for having feelings like he did for his own brother. He slid down the door in angst and nearly punched the wall out of self-hatred.

"I'm sorry." Gilbert squeaked out. "I've been involved with him."

Ludwig bit his lip and nearly began to break down in tears.

"I'm so sorry. I let you do this because I felt bad for forcing him down. Please don't hate me Bruder." Gilbert managed to whisper, his head hung in disgrace.

Ludwig walked out of the bathroom, exclaiming that he hated himself more than anything. "I need to leave for a while," he put his jacket on and walked down the stairs and out the door without telling Gilbert where he was going.

"Nein! Bruder! Please... Come back!" Gilbert begged, on his heels, not bothering to care about his lack of clothes

"I'll be at the pub, if you want to talk there," Ludwig added as he popped his head back in and out the door again.

Gilbert stood, naked in the foyer, staring at the door, aware of the Austrian's presence, but not paying him mind as he turned around to trudge up the the stairs to collect his clothes before dressing and following him to the bier hall.


	3. Chapter 3

**Author's note:** This was done in a Role Play with me as Prussia and Austria, and my good friend Linnéa as Germany.

**Disclaimer:** Hetalia and it's characters are © Hidekazu Himaruya. I just wrote a story about the characters.

**Rating:** This story is rated M for a reason. This multi-chapter story does contain Yaoi (gay sexy times) language, alcohol use, war, and mention of the Nazi party.

* * *

><p>"Bruder..." Gilbert said softly for once as he came up behind Ludwig.<p>

Ludwig was now seated at his usual place at the bier hall, a half-naked young lady seated on his lap with her arms around his neck and her legs straddled around his waist.

"You're looking even better today than the other night, Herr Beilschmidt," she remarked, under the influence of something, clearly. He did a nervous chuckle, feeling a bit awkward after what his day had entailed.

"Ja, zat's nice," he said, gulping down a large amount of alcohol. "Darling, could you gladly get me another glass? Fresh out, sweetheart," He sweet-talked her, her hands on his chest. "Of course," she sat up and went to go get another glass of beer for him. Ludwig took the moment to stand up and walk outside to light up a cigarette.

"Ludwig." Gilbert put his hand on his brother's shoulder, trying to get his attention. He didn't have the strength for his normal, demanding voice.

Ludwig flinched, putting his hand on his chest. "You scared the piss out of me...What do you want, bruder?"

"You left me..." It was getting hard for him to mask his hurt.

"I had to leave for a little while. I couldn't handle the heavy air about in there," Ludwig was kind of shaking from having to talk about what had just happened.

"I'm sorry... I tzought he vas gone. You know how he gets lost. I tzought he'd be gone till I had to go find him." He took up a spot on the sidewalk next to his brother, leaning against the wall, in pain from the abandoned pleasure.

"Nein, I'm sorry for even touching you," He sat down and inhaled a huge puff of his cigarette.

"I'm not." A blush rose on his face, and he watched the white puffs of his breath in the cold air. "Not even Francis has gotten tzat far vith me before."

"I'm your brother. It's a totally different story," his voice more hoarse under the chill and serious.

"I don't care." Gilbert flushed harder. "Actually I kind of liked the taboo. Made it more forbidden, which made it fun."

"We have to hide it and that's almost just as painful."

"I know. I can't have a relationship with you like tzat. You could finish vhat you started tzough." With that, Gilbert looked off down the street, away from his brother, avoiding those blue eyes.

"Huh, not after zat..I can't do it," his emotional well-being was beginning to break just thinking about it.

"Vest... You have to... I can't finish it myself." his face got even redder, and he shifter his weight, his remaining arousal troubling him in his pants.

Ludwig contemplated the idea, but deep down he had to feel that same feeling again. "Meet me behind the bier hall.."

Gilbert turned his head quickly to look at the other. "Really?"

"Let's make this quick, ja?"

"Ja, bitte." Gilbert smirked a little bit, wondering what it would be like to do it outside in the cold, in an alley, with his brother.

"Well, c'mon," Ludwig walked around the corner, undoing his pants. Everyone screwed around the bier hall, all of them too drunk to notice who was having sex with who or what gender, so it was safe.

As much as Gilbert was nervous from being taken from behind, he unfastened his own pants and spread his legs, bending over a bit to encourage the other.

"You really are a fucking tease like everyone says you are," Ludwig dropped his pants and pressed himself against Gilbert, clearly already hard from the position he assumed.

Gilbert let out a gasp, and leaned against the wall at the entry, quick to resume his moans, trying to keep them reigned in this time.

Ludwig pushed himself inside, grunting to budge in at this vertical position out in the cold. He put his arms around Gilbert's hips and thrusted with as much fever as he had before.

Bitting his lip, Gilbert felt himself getting very hard again, despite the cold. He was panting now, his breath puffs of hot white in the frigid air.

Ludwig couldn't deny it; he got off fucking his brother, but it meant more than just that. It was making love to him, and surely that's all he wanted. He was going at it for a good while until his muscles tensed up around there and he was about to release himself. "Bruder, bruder..."

"Aaahhh..." Gilbert had lost himself in the moment, and just moaned in response. He was so close himself, his body was trembling, his gloved fingers digging into the stone wall. "Bitte!"

Ludwig took a gasp of breath and held it as he came inside him, riding his orgasm out.

Gilbert cried out at the hot seed filling him, his own body tensing as he came hard, splattering the wall with his own seed.

Ludwig pulled out after resting for a minute. He pulled up his pants and fastened them while he lit another cigarette.

Sliding down the wall, into the snow, Gilbert sat still a moment, panting, and watching the white freeze in the cold, not making a move to cover himself aside from letting his coat and jacket fall back down over him. "Help me home Bruder?"

"Of course," Ludwig helped Gilbert with his clothing.

Gilbert did his best to assist his brother, but he was so tired and spent, he wasn't much use. He also dreaded the walk with the fresh ache in his rear.

They finally got home, the walk more painful for Gilbert. "I really hope that bastard isn't home-" as soon as he opened the door, a certain somebody was waiting at the front door, an expression unexplainably angry.

"Vhere tze hell have you two been?" Roderich snapped as they entered the door. He hadn't been upset over Gilbert being with Ludwig. A bit hurt, perhaps, he'd only gone to see if he was alright when he heard what had sounded like screaming from downstairs, to learn Gilbert was with his brother. What really hurt was when they'd stormed out of the house.

"I'm sorry." Was all Gilbert managed to say to him, turning his head away from both of them in shame.

"Look, this isn't your business, if you'll just let us be on our way," Ludwig was steamed.

"Nein." The austrian narrowed his eyes at the german. It was one thing to have Gil sleeping with Ludwig. Yet it was another for the blond to tell him to butt out. Roderich wouldn't admit it openly, but he cared about the Prussian, and was feeling a very painful stab of jealousy.

"You must obviously forget this is MY house," Ludwig had Gilbert in one arm and used the other to shove his way past Roderich.

Roderich couldn't do much as he was shoved out of the way, he was too delicate to fight back, and he knew it, instead, he flashed a painfully questioning look at Gilbert. "Warum Gilbert?"

Gilbert refused to look at the austrian, he'd deal with his off-and-on lover later. Right now, all he wanted was a bath. "Don't push him Ludwig." He whispered quietly.

"Fick dich, Osterrich," Ludwig shot him a vicious look, careful not make sure Roderich didn't hear those words under Ludwig's breath. He took Gilbert upstairs and helped him into a hot bath.

Gilbert bit his tongue all the way upstairs, until they were in the bathroom. "Don't talk to him like tzat."

"Zat ungrateful arschloch thinks he can come barging in MEIN HAUS and talk to me like that? Nein.."

"Tzis vas mein haus first, und he is mein! He's only like tzat because it's me!" Gilbert glared at his younger brother, becoming upset and angry at Ludwig.

"You vwant to be zat way, you can run your own bath. I'm going to lie down."

"Vait! Vest! Come back! I'm humoring your vants, so you'd better damn well leave him out of al tzis!"

"...FICK..FICK DICH BRUDER! FICK DICHHH!" He slammed the door and locked it behind him.

Gilbert sat there in the warm bath, his body aching, and trembling. Biting back tears, he pulled his legs up to his chest. A few minutes later, the door cracks open and Roderich slips in silently. Gracefully crossing the smaller room, he sat down next to the tub, and stroked his hair gently.

Ludwig was holding in a lot of anger and he just wanted to scream and break things and throw shit. So...he did. A lot. He let out an immense fit of belting out yells and growls and started to hit furniture and throw things around. He marched into the bathroom and a fairly loud sound of glass breaking and falling could be heard from down the hallway.

Tears had begun streaming down Gilbert's face as he turned to let Roderich cradle his head in his hands, before the austrian pulled him to rest against his chest. "I'm sorry." He whispered, crying against the Austrian's lace frilled shirt.

Ludwig was sitting in his bathroom against the cabinet, letting his hand profusely bleed. The adrenaline of his anger blocked out the pain. He sat catatonic almost, refusing to care how badly he was hurt.

Gilbert remained in Roderich's arms for a while, until he stopped shaking, and the austrian went about helping him to clean himself up. They stayed in silence the whole time, nothing needing to be said. The austrian understood that the prussian was sorry, and the prussian understood the austrian had forgiven him. It was an unspoken connection between them gained from hundreds of years of dealing with each other.

Ludwig sat there for a good 2 hours before getting himself up and walking out of the bedroom. He was stoic, as if he had never had a fit or rage or that his hand was still dripping blood and glass shards were noticeably sticking out of him, or that tendons were torn and a bone or two had shot out of his fingers.

"I'm going to the hospital," his hand shaking violently and dotting his footsteps with red.


	4. Chapter 4

**Author's note:** This was done in a Role Play with me as Prussia and Austria, and my good friend Linnéa as Germany.

**Disclaimer:** Hetalia and it's characters are © Hidekazu Himaruya. I just wrote a story about the characters.

**Rating:** This story is rated M for a reason. This multi-chapter story does contain Yaoi (gay sexy times) language, alcohol use, war, and mention of the Nazi party.

* * *

><p>By this point, the two had silently finished in the bathroom and were sitting in comfortable silence in the living room. Gilbert ignored Ludwig as he passed, but Roderich noticed the dripping blood instantly. He quickly got up and pulled off his cravat.<p>

"Wartezeit..." Roderich said, stepping in front of Ludwig, and taking a chance. He gently grabbed the other's bleeding hand, and started wrapping it tightly. "At least let me dress it for tze cold." The austrian spoke softly, trying to show the German that all was forgiven.

Ludwig stood there staring at Roderich. "I'm sorry."

"You are forgiven." Roderich said calmly as he finished wrapping the wound, and tied the cravat to keep it secure. "Go get tzis dealt vitz."

"Tschuss," He walked out the door, holding his hand to his chest.

"Tschuss." He replied before returning to Gilbert, sitting next to him and settling in as the Prussian wrapped his arm around him in a rare display of affection.

Gilbert wasn't sure how he really felt about any of it. He was shell-shocked at the whole thing, and had found a new respect for his delicate austrian. "I'm sorry for everything."

Ludwig showed up back around midnight, his hand bandaged up for now. He saw the two curled up all lovingly. He held his tongue and walked in the kitchen close by. He grabbed something from the cabinet, but he dropped it. "VERDAMMT!" he yelled.

Gilbert was startled awake by the shout from the kitchen, not realizing they'd dozed off. He glanced at the clock and stretched a bit before extracting himself from Roderich's delicate arms, laying the austrian to rest comfortably amidst the pillows and cushions on the couch before quietly shuffling into the kitchen.

Ludwig was so frustrated with himself, he'd just about quit on trying to fix himself something to eat. "Fick mich," he repetitively whispered.

"Don't tzink I vant tze drama, Vest." Gilbert said plainly, his voice almost back, but trying not to wake the Austrian, or startle the german too badly.

"Go avay, I have enough problems," he was reaching high up in the cupboard for something when he dropped it. "Gott verdammt!" he huffed and walked off. "I guess I'll go to bed hungry tzen."

Gilbert grabbed Ludwig's arm and pulled him back before pushing him down into a chair. "Nein. Just calm down." With that, Gilbert started gathering some stuff around the kitchen, and started making his brother something to eat.

Ludwig sat in the chair. He'd clearly hadn't had a proper amount of sleep and he'd gone without a day or two's worth of meals. His diet consisted of bier and maybe a few pieces of fruit every now and then. He rubbed the black circles under his eyes and hissed when his hand started to sting. Ludwig fiddled for the morphine syringe the physician had given him to take home.

Gilbert sighed and set a plate of food in front of his brother, Wurst and Sauerkraut, and a plate for himself, sitting down and digging in.

"Can you help me vis tzis?" Ludwig held out the case with the syringe, the morphine vial, and the rubber tourniquet.

"Mmmh, Ja." Gilbert said, swallowing a bite and taking another before getting up and walking over, and taking the items from him before tying off the tourniquet, drawing a bit of morphine from the bottle, squeezing the air out of the needle, and injecting it into his brother's arm.

Ludwig hissed again with the large needle piercing his arm. After a few minutes, the pain ceased and he gladly obliged to eating without issues.

Gilbert smiled a bit and sighed as he sat down. "Some day, huh?"

"Mhhmm..." Maybe Gilbert injected a little more than Ludwig needed. He sat back in his chair in a daze.

Nodding, Gilbert went back to eating his food hungrily, exhausted from lack of sleep, overwork, and all the excitement.

"Bed, bitte.." Ludwig mumbled after he'd finished his food.

"Okay." Gilbert sighed and got up again, assisting his brother in getting up and helping him upstairs.

"Danke," his body was limp from and mental cooperation with it.

"Bitte." Gilbert answered, helping his not-so-little brother out of his clothes, and into bed.

As soon as his head hit the pillow, he was out like a light.

Gilbert let out a sigh of relief, and went back downstairs. Looking at his peaceful austrian a moment, he decided to scoop him up and carried him to bed as well. Once the other two were snugly in bed, he laid down next to Roderich and quickly drifted to sleep.


	5. Chapter 5

**Author's note:** This was done in a Role Play with me as Prussia and Austria, and my good friend Linnéa as Germany.

**Disclaimer:** Hetalia and it's characters are © Hidekazu Himaruya. I just wrote a story about the characters.

**Rating:** This story is rated M for a reason. This multi-chapter story does contain Yaoi (gay sexy times) language, alcohol use, war, and mention of the Nazi party.

* * *

><p>Ludwig was passed out the whole night and into the late afternoon. He woke up with a headache and his hand was killing him. He thew his head back in pain. That single isolated area that was injured was so bad, it hurt his whole body.<p>

Gilbert was in the snowy garden, checking on the dormant rose bushes and taking small glances at his Austrian, who was sitting peacefully under the barren tree, reading a book in the unseasonably warm sun. It pleased him to see such a change int he Austrian that he was outside enjoying instead of banging on his piano all day.

Ludwig's hand was bleeding heavily through his bandages, but he couldn't do anything about it. It was so bad that he was unable to get the will power to move. "Bruder! Somevone!"

Gilbert's ears perked a bit as he thought he heard something, and sighed before getting up, removing his gloves and going inside. "Bruder?"

He did nothing but cry out in pain. Who knew an injury in his hand like this could hurt as much as it did. He'd been shot on occasion multiple times and it never hurt this bad. He honestly sounded very pitiful.

Gilbert rushed upstairs, into his brother's room. "Vest! Are you alright?"

His eyes were flooded with tears and his bed sheets were stained from where his hand had been. The morphine was sitting on the end table. He was praying to Gott his brother would hurry up and help him.

"Mein gott Vest..." Gilbert quickly grabbed the morphine and gave him the shot, hurrying as much as he could while still being careful with the needle. After a moment, Gilbert took Ludwig's hand and started undoing the soiled dressing.

"Make it stop! BITTE!" it would make anyone caring of that man cry. His body was writhing underneath the sheets and he was sweating. Maybe the hand had been infected. Otherwise, it wouldn't have made him hurt so much.

Gilbert didn't stop, and he didn't speak, he just continued to work on the dressing. When he had it unwrapped, he got up of his seat on the edge of the bed. Walking away a moment, he came back with alcohol, fresh bandages, a bowl of hot water, and a washcloth and began to clean the wound.

"GOTT, IT HURTS!" Ludwig didn't pry his eyes open to even look at his hand. Seeing it would only worsen his feeling.

"You big baby. I just took your huge cock up my ass yesterday, and I didn't whine. Man up and let me clean tzis!" Gilbert stopped and glared at his brother a moment before wiping the blood away with hot water, then moving on to the alcohol.

"Fuck you," he said to him.

"You already did. Hope you liked it."

Ludwig didn't offer any rebuttle but to writhe in pain.

Gilbert deliberately pressed too hard on the wound as he wiped the wound with rubbing alcohol.

Ludwig spit in Gilbert's face. "I saw zat.."

Gilbert ignored it and wiped it again with the hot water before applying a salve and bandaging the wound again.

"Fucking inject the morphine..." Ludwig held back a groan that eventually came out as a yell.

"I already did you idiot." Gilbert said plainly as he finished with the gauze.

"Vwhy's it taking so long zen..? AHHH!" he reeled back onto the bed. "More.."

"Nein. No more. You've already had enough." The prussian got up and picked up what he had brought before forcing Ludwig up and tearing the bloody sheets off the bed.

Ludwig sat up, still hurting, but less. "Just have ze maids wash zem.." he grabbed his robe off the side of the bed.

"Obviously." Gilbert growled, getting frustrated as he balled the sheets up and looked at the stain soaked into the mattress. "Look at tzis... I give you mein haus, and you ruin the mattresses and break glass."

He growled under his teeth. "Excuse me for just bleeding all over the place like some uncontrollable animal.."

Gilbert ignored ludwig, and went to the bathroom that had been trashed the night before, and got water and towels to try and clean the bloodstain.

Ludwig tried to stand up to get back on his feet.

Gilbert spent a few minutes getting the stain out and finally stood back and sighed, shaking his head. "Just leave it to dry for a vhile." With that, he went back into the bathroom and picked up the mess that had been made the night before.

Ludwig walked to the bathroom and sat down next to his mess. "I'm sorry, bruder."

"It's okay." He sighed, he was tired, and just wanted to go back to his garden, but he couldn't let Ludwig's bathroom stay this way.

"I'll get it, bruder.." he started to pick up glass and put it in the small garbage can next to the sink.

"Nein. I'll do it. Go sit down and hold your hand above your heart." Gilbert grabbed a broom and dust pan and swept up the glass.

"But bruder..." Ludwig took a heavy sigh and went downstairs to relax in the living room.

Gilbert stayed upstairs cleaning the bathroom, shaking his head as Ludwig left.

Roderich wandered inside a few moments later, having reached the end of a chapter, and realizing that the prussian was no longer in the garden, and quirked his head to the side at the sight of Ludwig's bandaged hand. "Are you okay? Vhat happened?"

"Running low on pain killers and bleeding a lot," simple words were all he could manage, being a bit doped up like that.

Roderich blinked and went to sit next to Ludwig, and inspect the bandage. "Nein, I mean how did you hurt yourself?" He adjusted his glasses and gently rubbed Ludwig's arm.

Ludwig flinched a little bit at his soft touch. "I punched a mirror."

The austrian just nodded and kissed the german's hand in a paternal fashion of making a hurt feel better. "I'm sorry."

Ludwig blushed at the kiss. "It's alvwright; just a pain in mein ass to deal viz...ze doctor said if it doesn't get any better, it has to have surgery.."

"Let's hope it doesn't come to tzat, jawhol?" Roderich smiled warmly, and let go. "You should hold it up, to stop the bleeding."

"Jawohl..err..can I ask you something?" A thought had been swarming around in Ludwig's head for a while now.

Roderich looked at Ludwig questioningly. "Jawhol, Vhat is it?"

"Umm...huh...never mind..it's too embarrassing and ja.."

Roderich was interested now, and raised an eyebrow. "Nein, Vhat is it?"

"I kind of had this thing...I've always thought that..." Ludwig was finding it hard to say what he wanted to say.

"Go on." Roderich was seriously curious now.

"I've had affections for you since the day you moved in here.." He bit his lip and wanted to scream for being so stupid.

Roderich just smiled warmly and nodded politely. "I see. Altzough, I'm sure you're aware tzat I'm..." His voice trailed off in slight embarrassment. "I care for Gilbert very much..."

"That certainly doesn't stop me..." He leaned in and kissed Roderich on the cheek. "Just to let you know.."

Roderich flushed and pulled back. "N-nein... Please don't do tzat..."

"Do vwhat?" He kissed him again.

Roderich tried to push him off, turning his face away from the kiss. "Ludwig, stop it!" He exclaimed, looking up at the stairs, desperately hoping Gilbert would appear on them.

"He's busy, Roderich..." Ludwig put his arm around him and kissed him on the mouth.

"Mmph!" Roderich's eyes went wide and he desperately tried to push the larger man off of him, but had little luck. He always cursed himself for not being stronger at moments like this. All he wanted to do was call out for Gilbert, but he couldn't.

Ludwig pulled away, feeling awkward once again. "I'm sorry, but-" He walked off, not knowing where he was even going. He just had to get out of there.

Roderich sat there dumbfounded for a moment, before bolting up stairs, searching for Gilbert, finding him in the bathroom and throwing his arms around him.

Ludwig did what he always did and ran off somewhere where maybe he wouldn't be found for a long while. He jolted off in the direction of the bier hall, but that was too easy, so he looked for somewhere else, ashamed.

Gilbert was surprised by the sudden affection and gave the austrian a surprised look. "Oi, Priss, Vhat's the matter?"

"I'm scared of Ludwig... he forced a kiss on me..." Roderich had his face buried in Gilbert's neck, trying to hide the shame on his face.


	6. Chapter 6

**Author's note:** This was done in a Role Play with me as Prussia and Austria, and my good friend Linnéa as Germany.

**Disclaimer:** Hetalia and it's characters are © Hidekazu Himaruya. I just wrote a story about the characters.

**Rating:** This story is rated M for a reason. This multi-chapter story does contain Yaoi (gay sexy times) language, alcohol use, war, and mention of the Nazi party.

* * *

><p>Ludwig had been walking all over the place for an escape when he finally found a place of momentary solace - the graveyard. It was incredibly old, and no one had really gone there ever, so he wouldn't worry for anyone finding him for a while. He just needed a place to think. He propped himself against the tree that was surrounded by broken up tombstones. His body was starting to tire out and soon, he was in more pain again. But he was without his morphine, and he'd rather be there to suck up his pride and go back home.<p>

Gilbert stroked his precious austrian's hair, and gently soothed his shaking frame. Wrapping his arms around him, they sat in silence for a few moments until Roderich stopped shaking. "Oi, Priss, you're so weak. Vhat happened?"

Roderich recounted what had occurred, and looked away in shame that he was so powerless. "I'm sorry Gilbert, I couldn't push him off."

"Do you know where he vent?" The question only garnished a shake of the other's head. With a nod, Gil took the austrian back to his room to calm down, and went out after his brother. He swore he'd end this nonsense today before it went any further.

Ludwig was sitting in a pool of his own conflicting emotions. He didn't know what to do or think or act or anything anymore. After long thought, he put his foot forward and put an end to all his nonsense. He marched himself back to the town center to the government building. He read a flyer attached to the front window.

It read:

"The Fatherland needs all its men! Enlist for the Fuhrer!"

He stood and thought for a second, and went in the office. Injured or not, he thought of a way to straighten out himself and perhaps...be away from that house that gave him hell for being who he was.

Ludwig was there for a while, and with some strings pulled, he was officially enlisted in the German army. He walked out with some papers and soon enough, a new uniform. The position he applied for with what experience he had under his belt was quite a dark one to have.

He meandered back home with an envelope under his arm and an emotionaless look on his face. He opened the door, expecting to be treated to a gun to his head by either his brother or Roderich or both even.

Gilbert was going around town frantically trying to find his brother. He had absolutely NO idea where he might have gone.

In the meantime, Roderich sat alone upstairs in his room, looking at his violin, but didn't have the heart to pick it up. The last few days had held so many conflicting emotions, he couldn't bear to hear how they might play out in his music.

"I'm home..?" Ludwig said.

Roderich's heart jumped into his throat at the sound of Ludwig's voice. He didn't want to deal with him alone, and he rushed to lock the door to his room. His heart was pounding, fearful after their encounter earlier in the day.

"Hmm." He walked into the kitchen and poured himself a glass of schnapps.

Gilbert was still searching around town, and finally got a lead on Ludwig having been seen enlisting, and Gilbert's heart sank. He certainly had no love for the new 'fuhrer' as he was being called. Angrily, he went down to the office to try and track his brother down.

Ludwig downed more and more schnapps until half a bottle had been consumed. He took off his shirt and laid it down with his papers on the kitchen table.

Gilbert ended up screaming at the officers down at the enlistment office over his brother's enlistment, and ended up getting thrown out into the street, landing in a puddle of very cold melted snow.

Meanwhile, Roderich curled up on his bed, wondering what was going to happen between Gilbert and Ludwig.

Ludwig sat down in the living room, unaware and quite uncaring that his brother was out looking for him.

Gilbert ended up walking home soaking wet in the freezing cold, cursing the whole way, garnishing looks from the people on the street.

Roderich finally forced himself up, going to the trunk he'd placed at the foot of his bed. He opened it and looked at the contents. He wasn't sure exactly why he'd done what he had. Maybe it was to try and gain some control over his life, to make himself feel less weak. He wasn't sure, but his fingers passed ever so gently over the fine black wool and silver buttons. He cringed slightly, but pulled it out and set the field jacket on the bed, staring at it.

Ludwig was still sitting inside when he herad someone come on, still not caring who it was knowing who it was. "Welcome home," he said, now drinking out of the bottle of schnapps.

Gilbert just glared at the younger, standing in the doorway, staring a hole through him.

"You don't have to worry about killing me now. The German army is going to do that for you," Ludwig said.

"They won't get a chance. Take that damned uniform off, RIGHT NOW!" Gilbert screeched, slamming his fist on the doorframe.

"Fucking make me."

Gilbert didn't skip a beat and dove at the blond, pinning him and attacking the buttons. Moments later, they heard the clearing of a throat in the doorway.

Roderich stood in the doorway, watching the two of them on the floor, adorned in tall black boots, black riding pants, a khaki field blouse, black uniform jacket, belt strap, iron cross, and red armband. "Vhat tze hell is going on?"

"Finally, somevone who vears ze same pride," Ludwig was on top of Gilbert, trying to keep him from turning him over and strangling him.

Gilbert's breath caught in his throat and he stopped struggling with Ludwig and stared at his lover blankly. "Roddy... Vhy?"

Roderich just stared at Gilbert and Ludwig in distaste. "Because I vas forced out of mein own haus, brought here, completely powerless, and forced to live here in tzis stupidity! Tzat's why!" With that, Roderich stormed out with more ferocity than either of them had ever seen him wield.

Ludwig pushed Gilbert aside and walked out the door. "I have orders to report to my superior officer," he said. "I might be back.." He went out the door and back to his station.

Gilbert was left alone in the kitchen dumbfounded, not sure which he should go after. He decided to go after Roderich first, jogging after him and getting ignored as he came up behind him.

"Roddy. Oi! Roddy!" Gilbert called, but was ignored until he put his hand on the other's shoulder. This garnered a very unexpected reaction. Roderich whipped around and slapped Gilbert squarely across his cheek.

Ludwig took to his duties first thing; he was to be shipped off with his fellow commanders to the war front.

Gilbert was so surprised by Roderich's slap, that he stood there in shock as the austrian spun on his heel and left the big house as well.

Roderich had to report for duty anyways, He was lucky that he would be working as more of a docile setting, in investigations. It was more his pace, and he felt powerful, walking about the office, and eventually on the streets.


	7. Chapter 7

**Author's note:** This was done in a Role Play with me as Prussia and Austria, and my good friend Linnéa as Germany.

**Disclaimer:** Hetalia and it's characters are © Hidekazu Himaruya. I just wrote a story about the characters.

**Rating:** This story is rated M for a reason. This multi-chapter story does contain Yaoi (gay sexy times) language, alcohol use, war, and mention of the Nazi party.

* * *

><p>The next day, Ludwig found himself in a shipment of other officers on the way to the Warsaw Ghetto to contain the supposed uprising there. He had more power in the palm of his hands now. He felt in control because in reality, he couldn't control himself; controlling others filled that void in the pit of his stomach and his heart.<p>

Gilbert had tried his damnedest to let his austrian go do what he wanted, but he just couldn't. He ended up falling back into his OLD habit of stalking the man throughout the entire city of Berlin. Making sure his Roddy wasn't getting hurt, and getting a closer look at this new regime in the meantime.

Roderich however, was enjoying himself. Never in his life had he had this kind of confidence and power. He's had political power before, but it wasn't really the same. He was good at this, and he had respect. The uniform earned him instant respect, and it made him more confident in himself.

A few months had gone by, when a letter arrived in the mail. Someone had to have been home, for it read URGENT on the envelope.

Gilbert had been sitting behind, waiting for his Austrian to be far enough gone for him to not suspect Gil of following him. It had become routine, and so far, he hadn't been caught, this time, he managed to catch the post as it arrived before he left after his lover.

The letter was addressed to the next-of-kin, that being Gilbert. It came from the war department, usually letters addressed like that weren't good.

Gilbert's heart was in his throat over what the letter could possible say, and he ripped it open eagerly.

The letter read,

"Dear Sir or next of kin,

We regret to inform you that in regards of Ludwig Beilschmidt, said faimly member, has been found under correct medical circumstances, in his duties, fatally wounded. He has passed away, serving the Fatherland. His sacrifice shall not be forgotten."

Gilbert's hand went to his mouth, and he had to reach for the nearest piece of furniture to stabilize himself. A moment later, he was out the door with his coat, and chasing after Roderich, finding him all too quickly, having learned his routine.

In the meantime, Ludwig's body was being taken care of to be shipped back to the city where funeral arrangements could be carried out thereafter.

Roderich was surprised to hear Gilbert calling out to him on the street. Things had been going poorly between them of late since the entire debacle with the uniforms. He stopped and turned, a quizzical look on his face as he was handed the letter. A moment later he lost his composure and found himself in Gilbert's arms on the street. For all his difficulties with the german, he still cared about him like a son, or a brother, so it ripped his heart out to learn of his death.

A couple of days had gone by. An attendent came up to the door with forms for Gilbert to fill out. He knocked on the door.

Gilbert got up to answer the door. He'd been sitting in the living room with his precious austrian, who'd gotten some days off for mourning. "Hallo?"

"Herr Beilschmidt?" He asked, "I'm here on behalf of..the department. I'm sorry for your loss..May I have you sign a few things so I can help with the arrangements..?"

Gilbert nodded, and complied with the paperwork, trying not to glance back at Roderich, who was sitting pathetically on the sofa, legs curled up to his body.

"Now, just sign here and here and..." he trailed on with the dotted lines that were to be graced with a signature. "Thank you, Herr Beilschmidt..I'll have this processed immediately." He walked out the door and left the two in the house alone. Without Ludwig...without their Ludwig...

"Oh mein Gott... He's really gone..." Gilbert said weakly as he closed the door and returned to Roderich's side. The austrian's already fragile state shattered, and he collapsed into Gilbert's arms, sobbing.

The phone rang a few times before it could catch anyone's notice.

Gilbert had to drag himself out of Roderich's arms, the frailer of the two clinging, his arms outstretched, holding Gil's hand to the last moment they could reach before falling pathetically into his lap as the prussian picked up the phone. "Hallo?"

"Hallo Herr Beilschmidt. I'm calling from the military's mortician office. I need the next-of-kin to assure identification of the body of Ludwig Beilschmidt," the stoic man on the other end explained.

"Jawhol... Tzat's me. I'll be down tzere soon." Gilbert hung up, and went to get his coat, returning to Roderich to give him a gentle kiss before heading out the door to go down to the morgue.

"Ah, are you Herr Beilschmidt?" the mortician asked. "Right this way..." He led Gilbert down to the back where the special bodies of 'military honor' were kept until burial. "I'm sorry for your loss, Herr Beilschmidt..." He pointed over to the table in the middle of the room. It was fully covered in a white sheet. "I'll...let you two be..."

Gilbert slowly walked over to the table. He wasn't sure if he could handle what he was about to see. He fancied himself a strong prussian man, but Roderich's emotional state recently had him worked up. Slowly and cautiously, he pulled the sheet back, gasping and covering his mouth, shaking his head, tears forming in his eyes. "Oi! OI!" He called out to the mortician who had hung back, or left, Gil hadn't been paying attention.

A bullet wound was in Ludwig's chest, right over his heart. His skin was pallied and dark rings were under his eyes. Lifeless as lifeless could appear in human form. And saddened more or less by how the life ended.

"Is there something wrong?" The mortician steadily entered the room.

"Das ist nicht mein Bruder." Gilbert was shaking his head. That wasn't West... that couldn't possibly be West. His brother was still alive.

"How can that be, though..?" The mortician maniacally flipped through all sorts of paperwork, OFFICIAL military paperwork, and they NEVER made a mistake with such things.

"I'm telling you, dat es nicht mein Bruder!" Gilbert insisted. "Mein bruder doesn't look like tzis. I don't know who tzis man is! Mein bruder vould have had a scar on his chest!" Gilbert proclaimed, pointing to a bare spot. "He got burned vhen he vas about eight, und tzis man has no scar! Not to mention tzat face doesn't even look like him!"

"B-but this can't be! I mean, take a look for yourself!" He handed the papers over to Gilbert.

Gilbert looked over them thoroughly and shook his head before pulling his wallet out and producing a photo of his brother from the earlier summer, the three of them, Gil, Ludwig, and Roderich, posing at the beach. He showed it to the man, pointing to his brother. "Tzis is Ludwig Beilschmidt. Mein Bruder. Das! Das is nicht mein Bruder!" He was frantic, and nearly screaming as he pointed to the man on the table.


End file.
